officialunitedstates:

"What does the chef recommend?"

"Sir, this is a mcdonalds"

thegestianpoet:

reminder to look at this pup’s widdle feeties 

so i saw john mayer tonight and it was sooooooo amazing and i never properly appreciated how good a guitarist he really is until i saw him live and he’s so beautiful and he was v funny and he played edge of desire so i started crying a lot

zach-hi:

rubee:

im going to fuck everyone. i will fuck every single everybody. only then will i die. santa isnt real

What

im going to fuck everyone. i will fuck every single everybody. only then will i die. santa isnt real

Capitalism good, no?

probably. my political views are sea otters

im outtie. seeya suckas

im outtie. seeya suckas

i am not a punk and give me back my teeth. mum said that would be nice and to pick her up at 7 >:(
Anonymous

THE TEETH ARE MINE NOW. YOUR TEETH AND THE TEETH OF BILLIONS

grampas:

local teen explains hentai

the-winchester-initiative:

posthumous-mcdouble:

Hypothesis: if women are worse at parking, it’s only because they’ve been lied to about what eight inches is their entire lives

image